Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future.
Author: Niels Bohr
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
Author: Stephen Bishop
You can’t make anything idiot-proof because idiots are so ingenious.
Author: Ron Burns
I hate music, especially when it’s played.
Author: Jimmy Durante
Everybody hates me because I’m so universally liked.
Author: Peter De Vries
There’s nothing wrong with sobriety in moderation.
Author: John Ciardi
How is it possible to have a civil war?
Author: George Carlin
Modesty is my best quality.
Author: Jack Benny
I’m in favor of free expression provided it’s kept rigidly under control.
Author: Alan Bennett
I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
Author: Unknown
When all else fails, read the instructions.
Author: Agnes Allen
Stay with me; I want to be alone.
Author: Joey Adams
We have to believe in free will. We’ve got no other choice.
Author: Isaac Bashevis Singer
I want to die young at a ripe old age.
Author: Ashley Montagu
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
Author: Margaret Mead
Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one’s living at it.
Author: Albert Einstein
When I came home I expected a surprise and there was no surprise for me, so, of course, I was surprised.
Author: Ludwig Wittgenstein
A serious work in philosophy could be written that consisted entirely of jokes.
Author: Ludwig Wittgenstein
I’m an atheist and I thank God for it.
Author: George Bernard Shaw
I believe in the discipline of silence and could talk for hours about it.
Author: George Bernard Shaw
England and America are two countries separated by the same language.
Author: George Bernard Shaw
To be natural is a very difficult pose to keep up.
Author: Oscar Wilde
Life is too important to be taken seriously.
Author: Oscar Wilde
The suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.
Author: Oscar Wilde
I’m a Scotch Calvinist and nothing makes us happier than misery.
Author: James “Scotty” Reston
Jews don’t drink much because it interferes with their suffering.
Author: Milton Berle
It is our farewell performance, and I hope the first of many.
Author: Garrison Keillor
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.
Author: Mark Twain
One martini is all right, two is two many, three is not enough.
Author: James Thurber
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.
Author: Robert C. Benchley