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Funny Examples of Oxymorons (Oxymora)
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Internal Consultant

cold as hell

cat fish

Innovative Patent

Back to the Future

(Movie)

Tomorrow on today ( from today show commercials )

ourselves alone

Just can’t be

Honest FIFA official

Honest FIFA official

Naval Aviation

Naval = water related. Aviation = air related. military’s biggest oxymoron.

wide focus

Biggie Smalls (the Rapper)

Biggie Smalls (the Rapper)

good HP device

I have an HP printer. IT IS JUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A precious commodity

Desert of water

Idiotic Sage

Friendly Neighborhood Lawyer

From our corporate counsel’s email signature

Purposeful Accident

“Purposeful Accident” – Something that happened by accident but resulted into something meaningful. Eg: “It was as if by some purposeful accident …

Plain Abnormal

Because some people are just plain abnormal

Intelligent Moron

They’re in our everyday life.

Illiterate Reader

The rarest creature on earth

New used tires

Startlingly Expected

Your alarm clock is startlingly expected

Premium Bamboo (Cutting Board)

open loop

Frozen Waterfall

Free Rent

New fossil

Wise Fool

Open Secret

Happily Married

Paid Volunteer

This was a billboard by Yale University: Volunteers Needed! Get Paid for Your Time

Christian Science

Healthy DID System

Where “DID System” means a person with Dissociative Identity Disorder, a Healthy DID System is an oxymoron.

Vermont Republicans

Unbiased judgment

Inevitable Possibility

team selfie

A pattern of unpredictability

happy marriage

Precious Zilch

zero value

we must fight violence

Using a wrong, to correct a wrong, as in, fighting war for peace…

If they are going to give it away, I’ll buy it.

If a store has a great sale on an item…a very low price, I will buy it.

Be here now, when you can.

Enlightened darkness

Someone being enlightened from a dark place in their mind

uniquely similar

darkness visible

No light; but rather darkness visible Served only to discover sights of woe, Regions of sorrow, doleful shades, where peace And rest …

seriously kidding me

serious and kidding don’t make sense. to kid around means to joke, which is the opposite of serious

business philosopher

A true philosophic outlook is incompatible with being in business as practiced in the context of globalization. The business would not survive.

Think like a woman

open circuit

it ain’t a circuit if its open

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