absolutely nothing
the words contradict each other. Absolutely nothing, can’t actually be nothing. It is still something.
Liberal Logic
There is no liberal logic.
Affordable Health Care Act (Obamacare)
It certainly will be anything but affordable.
Jews for Jesus
If you believe in Jesus as a deity, you cannot be Jewish. If you are Jewish, you do not believe that Jesus …
urine therapy
Just can’t be
permanent consultant
I had a call from a recruiter regarding a tech job. He uses the phrase “permanent consultant” and I get immediately confused. …
American humour
If you are American, there’s no point in explaining. If you are not American, you already understand.
Logical woman
On the whole women don’t think logically & are not known for their logic
browse thoroughly
According to the Merriam Webster online Dictionary, browsing means a : to skim through a book reading passages that catch the eye …
soft hardwood
Some say that their hardwood is soft to the foot.
Working Mother
In a family with children the mother can be either employed in a job or a mother. I don’t believe that she …
Anarchist Leader
Anarchist don’t want a ruler…. So the leader of an anarchist…….
preemptive counterattack
My personal favorite; I’m astonished it’s not in your collection already. I BELIEVE I heard it used by someone in the Bush …
Busy resting
Writing about this slower paced season of my life where my busy-ness is wrapped up in resting/taking it easy
new zealands got talent
The two are not mutually compatible
indifferent difference
When someone says the same thing as you but they have a different point.
modern victorian
The act of taking an old furnishing and giving it a modern touch. Ex.when Jamie put new modern fabric on the old …
Real Ghost
Ghosts are fake, so they can’t be real.
negative income
Really?? does it need explaining??
lesbian mother
Self explanatory
dead reckoning
The dead don’t reckon
british columbia
Self explanatory
Real fake
Self explanatary
Silent Verbal
This is a pretty common term in College Football recruiting. A recruit will give his verbal commitment to join a football team …
Obama Administration
He’s seems to complain frequently that all problems are news to him and the responsibility of subordinates.
hurry up to wait
speeding up to make it to intersection where you still have to wait
today tomorrow
a talk show
Weirdly normal
It’s saying that it’s so normal it’s weird.
Bible Scholar
Self explanatory.
Free Slave
A slave who is spared or had worked to gain his/her freedom is free alright – but has the tag “free slave”.
Sunny Seattle or Sunny in Seattle
Is an explanation necessary? We don’t tan in the pacific northwest, we rust.
masterchef new zealand
Two contradictory statements if ever there were.
A happy Monday
Monday is the most hated day of the week.
Truth, justice and the American Way
The too big to fail banks made it pretty clear, I think.
Beautifully ugly
Beautiful is opposite of ugly
supernormal
a person who is perfectly well or normal without any ailments of illness of any kind seen , and is a perfect …
affordable healthcare
self explanatory
GENERAL SPECIFIC, PRIVATE PUBLIC
THE OXYMORON CARTOON ‘SHEEP IN THE BIG CITY’
Responsible gun owner
obviously the two are in stark contrast…
Strategic Philanthropy
Philanthrophic giving is defined as the generous donation of wealth for good causes, without strings attached. Strategic has strings to it.
Roman Catholic
“Catholic” means universal. Roman only pertains to something of Rome.
British Customer Service
It is incongruous and self-contradictory
Virtually bulletproof
“Almost entirely impenetrable to bullets” is an oxymoron.
Happy Tears
One is usually crying when someone tearful. Someone who is happy feels positive emotion. Therefore, the two words, “happy,” and “tears” are …
artificial life
By definition these two words are contradictory!